Wedding Feature:
Still in love after 65 years together
Arnold & Minerva Thompson share their story
Posted: 1/27/04
By Shannon McKinney
Argus News Reporter
Even after 65 years of marriage, Minerva Thompson still melts under the spell of her husbandís blue eyes.
ìIíll get grumpy once in a while, and heíll look at me and Iíll say, ëI didnít mean that.íî
The Thompsons, who live in Caledonia, have been through their ups and downs but unlike most marriages have stuck together through it all.
The courtship
The two first met in Lanesboro where Arnold lived.
Minerva and a friend were spending the day in Lanesboro, shopping when they walked past Arnoldís parked vehicle. Minerva had seen Arnold once before in a restaurant and thought he was cute. Arnold asked the girls if they wanted to go someplace with him and his friend. Not missing a beat, Minerva remembers telling her friend, ìIím going with him (Arnold); you get in the back seat.î
The foursome found their way to a nightclub and danced the night away. ìHe was a good dancer, and I loved to dance,î she recalls.
A romance soon developed. At the time, Arnold worked at a civil conservation camp, but moved to La Crosse to drive semi trucks. He visited on the weekends and the two wrote each other letters during the week.
Minerva remembers that her grandmother thought the world of Arnold. ìThere was nothing better in the world than Arnold,î she said.
Minerva liked Arnold for his dark hair. ìHe had the most beautiful teeth. He had such a nice build on him. I didnít like skinny men. He was real muscular,î she said.
Arnold had always said he was attracted to Minervaís slender legs, auburn hair, green eyes and beautiful smile.
Of course, looks werenít everything. ìHe had a real pleasant personality,î she said.
The proposal
About after five or six months of dating, Arnold took Minerva to a movie. He pulled out a diamond ring and said, ìWell, I got a ring for you,î and then slipped it on her finger.
Minerva doesnít recall him asking her to marry him. ìI was so out of it maybe he did. I couldnít believe it. Of course, all I could think about was this ring during the movie.î
Nothing about marriage was spoken previous to this.
Minerva said the ring cost $50, which was a lot of money in 1928.
The next day, Arnold went to her father and asked if he could marry Minerva.
It wasnít until after they were married that Arnold told Minerva about her fatherís response. He said, ìShe isnít a very good housekeeper. Thereís two inches of dust underneath the bed.î
Minerva explained that her father didnít want her to leave because she had been taking care of the house since the age of 13 because her mother had died. She had three older brothers and a sister who was seven years younger. ìMy dad was an old-timer,î she said.
Minerva said she actually enjoys cleaning and cooking. ìArnold didnít believe him,î she said.
The wedding date was set six months later for October 12, 1938 at the parsonage of Pastor Nestande in Lanesboro. About 12 people attended. Minerva wore a burgundy velvet dress with a white satin dickey. She purchased the outfit from Fantles in La Crosse.
After the wedding, dinner was held at her fatherís house. A reception and dance was held a week after the wedding where many people attended.
Minerva was 19 years old and Arnold was 23.
The marriage
The Thompsons moved to Chicago, where Arnold drove truck, after they were married.
Minerva gave birth to a son, Tony, October 6, almost a year after they were married.
Soon after, they moved to La Crosse, La Crescent, and the Twin Cities.
When he worked in Chicago, he was able to be home every night for the first year of their marriage. In the years following, however, his truck driving job required him to be on the road during the week and at home for a day or two on the weekends. ìThey called him all hours of the night. Heíd be home for eight hours and then gone,î she said.
If she had to do it differently, said Minerva, she would have preferred for her husband to have a job where he was home during the week to help with the children, five in all. She found she ended up trying to be the loving mother and disciplinarian, at the same time. It was hard to maintain consistent discipline when Arnold was home because the children were excited to see him.
Her second child, a girl, Donna, was born 18 months after Tony.
Julie, was born seven year later, Alda was born five years later and Kevin, seven year after that. There is a 20 year difference between the oldest and youngest sons.
During the earlier years, Minerva operated a 15 cow jersey farm, while her husband continued to drive semi.
She recalls that she hated milking the cows. She also raised jersey calves. ìWhen I would have to sell them, Iíd cry,î she said.
The children are the one thing she wouldnít change about their marriage. ìI canít see not having them. They mean the world to me and their dad. If they donít hear from us they call,î she said.
Arnold has been retired for 33 years. At first it took Minerva a while to get used to him being around all the time. But she likes it, and they get along.
The advice
When asked what was the secret to such a long marriage, Minerva responded that there needs to be give and take. ìDonít throw the towel in right away. You can always work things out. Youíve got to forgive and forget. Otherwise if you donít, youíll be having that grudge against you,î she said.
Marriage at this age still has its romantic moments, said Minerva.
Arnold turned 89 last week. He suffers from a nerve disease in his legs, that allows him no feeling in his legs starting below his knees.
He likes Minerva to put him to bed, help with his pajamas, and give a kiss before leaving the bedroom. ìWhen youíre as old as we are, and you have to have a kiss, thatís kind of cute,î she said.
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